If you’d prefer your ex to be out of the house during this time, make your request clear. Hopefully, you’ve already completed Step 5 and are both clear on which items you’re taking. Let them know when you plan to pack up your belongings and when you plan to move them out. Whatever the case, if you can, work with your ex on a move-out timeline. Maybe you’ll need a few days, a few weeks, or even longer until you can establish a new residence. If you have a number of possessions at your ex’s home, including larger items like appliances and furniture, you’ll need to come up with a plan for moving them out. Consider making a list of your top wants and having your ex do the same to see if you can whittle down the big-ticket items and anything of sentimental value. If things are a little more heated or your shared estate is complex, you might need to bring in a mediator or a lawyer for assistance. If you and your partner are able to communicate respectfully, you might be able to sit down together and negotiate ownership of your possessions. If you have pets together, things can get even messier. You might also find yourself dealing with financial issues like shared bank accounts and trying to find an amicable way to split up the furniture, your DVD collection, and your Net f lix subscription.
However, if you’ve been together for years, it can be tricky to remember who owned what when you moved in or which items you purchased as a couple belongs to whom. If you haven’t been living with your partner for long, it may be simple to split your possessions. Work With Your Ex To Split Your Possessions If hard feelings abound, it’s best to proactively protect your property just in case. It doesn’t matter who ended the relationship. See if you can stash your things with a friend, or consider renting a locker or small space at a storage facility nearby. Take expensive items - electronics, equipment, tools, jewelry, mementos, instruments, artwork, etc.
If the breakup is acrimonious or you feel like you can’t trust your ex, then protect your valuable possessions. If you and your partner are able to achieve an amicable breakup or are at least able to maintain a respectful relationship, you may not need to follow this step. Packing and moving can be gut-wrenching, so you may need some time before you can clear all your things out of your shared home. You can always return to the home or apartment in the coming days to box up your things and get them out of there. You may not have the time or want to stay in the home long enough to pack more. If the breakup comes as a surprise or you need/want to leave the home quickly, pack an overnight bag containing a few days worth of outfits and toiletries. If you need to figure out how to move out quickly, you can even rent a hotel room, motel room, or vacation rental (like Airbnb) in a pinch until you figure out your next steps. If you have time to plan your exit, you may want to look into renting an apartment, house, or room in the area. If you didn’t see the breakup coming, you might need to reach out to friends or family members for a temporary couch or guest bedroom to crash on. Whether you find yourself moving out unexpectedly or after many discussions with your ex, your first order of business is to find alternative lodgings. If your ex wants to go down memory lane, redirect communication to focus on coordinating your separation. That may mean texting instead of talking in person. If your feelings are still raw, communicate with your ex only when necessary and stick with logistics. Stay focused on separating your lives (easier said than done, we know!). If possible, avoid rehashing your fights or the reason for the breakup. It can help moving out go more smoothly and help you with moving on from the breakup. Any way you feel is valid, but keeping things as cordial as possible with your ex can make the breakup process much easier.
You may feel angry, resentful, betrayed, or simply exhausted with your partner when you decide to call it quits. However, keep in mind that moving out and moving on after a breakup could be the first step toward healing your heart. Moving out of your home can be emotionally devastating (on top of the breakup itself!). If that person is you, take a look at these 10 tips for how to move on after a breakup. Most challenging of all, someone needs to move out. Now you have to figure out how to split shared belongings and perhaps custody of a pet or child. Breakups can seem twice as hard when you and your partner live together.
Whether a breakup blindsided you or you saw it coming a mile away, it still hurts.